We all know that one guy who has watched a million more movies than you ever will.
For some reason this gives them an inner sense of self entitlement to believe that their opinion on movies is rated higher than yours. They may have seen Citizen Kane, Kramer vs Kramer and they are never out of Art-House Cinemas.
Equally annoying are Comic Book guys. Don’t get me wrong, I love Sci-Fi. I watched the latest Star Trek movies and when Buffy the Vampire Slayer was on BBC 2 on Thursday nights I never missed it.
But it’s when these guys get on their high horse about movies or sci-fi that I start to get annoyed. When that happens I try and think of the worst statement or question I can ask them in order to wind them up. I see it as almost a sport, like bridge or golf.
Nothing fills me with joy more than when I manage to crack them and turn them into frustrated little teenagers who have just been denied free Wi-Fi.
In my many travels and conversations with these people I have found a list of the statements which I find to work the best. Try them out for yourself next time you find yourself in the company of a Comic Book guy or Film Buff.
- My favorite Western is Back to the Future 3
- George Clooney should be the next James Bond
- There should be a sequel to Inception
- In a way Wall E is a sequel to Interstellar
- Nicolas Cage is the Greatest Actor of our time
- They should make more movies based on the police
- Movies before Jurassic Park aren’t worth watching
- Why do they make movies with subtitles? Why can’t they all just speak English?
- They should make a Star Wars meets Star Trek movie
- Ghost heavily influenced the Matrix
- What would happen if Spider-man sprayed his webbing into his mouth?
- When Clark Kent needs to use the bathroom at the Daily Planet he must have to go through a lot of layers. Maybe he has a super bladder and he can hold it all in until the end of the day.
- Only God Forgives is the worst movie of our generation, I don’t care if it’s a metaphor.
- If they want me to watch that black and white movie they better do a remake in Colour
- I don’t get Monty Python
- There just aren’t enough sequels these days
‘Life’ with Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence is better than the Shawshank Redemption.
Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure has better time travel logic than Looper.
As I said, this list is not exhaustive. If you can think of any more use #waystoannoymovienerds on Twitter
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